Poems
All poems and stories by Vicki Spangler
Please note poems/stories are copyrighted and may not be used or reproduced without prior permission via contact page.
Spirit And Soul
Autism Awareness
I Am Your Missionary
Tear-Stained Top
No Truer Friends
SPIRIT AND SOUL
“For you created my inmost being, you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
“I’m wonderful?” Spirit said.
“Fearfully wonderful,” replied Soul.
“Then why does Body neglect us so?” questioned Spirit.
“I guess she cares more for herself than us. After all, SHE’S the one everyone sees. SHE has to look good.”
“But”, wondered Spirit, “doesn’t she remember the days when she first met the Creator? The beginning, when I was regenerated and came to life? The day that The Creator’s Spirit entered in? The day that the brand new relationship with Him began? OH! What wonderful times we had! We enjoyed good meat then; feasting, too; fellowshipping with like Spirits AND plenty of it.”
“Oh, yes, I remember”, said Soul. “I magnified the Lord with great delight in those early days. How I long for such communion again. I feel so downcast, so disturbed, so empty.”
“Put your hope in God. Continue to praise Him”, encouraged Spirit.
“Oh, if only Body would know that joy. She seems so heavy and burdened as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders. How I wish she could jump and bounce and play and laugh like She once did. What joy could be hers again.”
“Don’t forget, Soul, our Creator keeps His promises. He has promised to give you rest if Body walks in the ‘good way’. Remember, Body is the weakest of the three of us,” mused Spirit.
“Yes, I suppose She is,” laughed Soul.
In that instant, Body felt something stir within her. Was it Imagination playing his old tricks again or was it the vague feeling of laughter deep within? Body wondered. Was there more to her? Was there more to Her existence than looking good and doing what was acceptable to everyone else? She remembered hearing once that the Creator looks at the inward appearance. Why had she wasted so much time on the outward? How could she have forgotten Her Master? Whether she realised it or not, Soul and Spirit were laughing all the more.
“Yes! Yes!” they cried. “She’s beginning to understand!”
And Spirit and Soul broke into delightful laughter because THEY knew Body was beginning to understand, once again, that the three of them would together praise The Creator.
Autism Awareness
April, in many states, has been declared Autism Awareness Month. Here in the UK, The NAS has declared the week of May 11th Autism Awareness Week.
So what, you say, I don't know anyone with autism. Maybe not, but I do. And he belongs to me.
My son is autistic. Many of you know my son. He doesn't look autistic, you say. Think of it this way. You may know someone right now who is pregnant. She might only be a month or two along and not showing much, does that make her any less pregnant? You may know someone who is diabetic, but from all outward appearances it goes undetected, yet sugar to him or her would be lethal. Just because you don't see something doesn't mean it isn't there.
To most of us, autism conjures up images of Dustin Hoffman in the movie "Rain Man", or maybe a child who just sits and rocks back and forth lacking speech and communication skills. Autism is what doctors call a spectrum disorder, meaning there are varying degrees. Some might be affected severely, others more mildly. His diagnosis is called Asperger's Syndrome, one of many autistic spectrum disorders. Although mild, he still has autism. You just can't see it. Or maybe you can.
Autism is a neurological disorder, so it affects the central nervous system. It affects how an autistic person takes in their surroundings, processes information and sensory stimuli, responds to life. To us, it is not a problem to go to the store - the lights, sounds, smells, movement and everything else do not really bother us. To us, it is not a problem to go to church - the volume or tempo of the music, the temperature of the building, is easily adjusted to. Imagine the feeling when someone runs his or her fingernails on the chalkboard. My child can get those same sensations from overhead lights, the wrong temperature, crowds or noise or any other number of stimuli that you and I never give a second thought. I plan my outings around my child and how it will affect him on that particular day.
With a combination of heredity and other factors, my child from early days has been autistic and he always will be.
There are therapies, programmes, and activities that with diligent routine will help him to function in his life, but his autism will never go away. He will learn best at home in an environment that shows patience, love, and understanding for his needs and abilities. In this environment he will flourish. My son is not the way he is because he is homeschooled; he is homeschooled because of the way he is.
My son has changed my life. I have grown. I have added hundreds of new words to my vocabulary. I have introduced a new diet to our family that the mere thought of two years ago would've scared me to death. I look at every child in a different light now. No, I don't evaluate and self-diagnose each one; I see them as individuals with unique personalities and unique combinations of characteristics. I know there is much more to their story.
Yes, my son has changed my life. He has added joy, laughter, and blessings too many to count. It certainly hasn't been easy, but blessings and growth don't come through the easy life. And I think that if you ever met my child, he would change your life, too.
He is one in a million and I wouldn't trade this life for anything.
I Am Your Missionary
I am your missionary
But I am a woman just like any other
With similar cares, frustrations, joys, blessings, and concerns
Please understand me.
I am your missionary
But I am no more spiritual than you are.
I, too, struggle daily to find that quiet time and place with God
Please understand.
I am a missionary wife
But the marital relationship is bombarded with pressures by the ministry,
Lack of true girl friends who understand,
Being in the minority as a Christian married couple with children.
Please understand me and help.
I am a mother
Homeschooling and raising my children in a culture different to my own,
On my own,
Struggling to undo the negative of this culture in them,
This culture which is now their home
Accents different to ours, and yours
Please understand them and be sensitive
I am a mother with a special needs child
Dealing with issues that most parents pass after toddler age
Desperately keeping balance between my priorities of family and ministry
Doing it all without nearby parents to call upon
Please understand me and offer encouragement and hope.
I am your missionary on furlough
But my children are not adapted to your way of life
Nor to your church service style
Don’t expect them to slot in
Please understand them while not being judgemental.
I am your missionary on furlough
Hanging on to friends made years ago
Realising they don’t need me as much as I need them
Non–existent opportunities to create new friendships
Please don’t hesitate to befriend me just because I’ll be gone soon.
Please understand my need for girl friends.
I am a servant of the Lord
Just like you
Granted special gifts and abilities
Sacrificing the luxuries of life in America
Sacrificing precious times with aging parents
Struggling always to figure out who I am
Sometimes feeling more at home in my new culture
Please understand me and pray for me.
Tear-Stained Top
My tear-stained top
Reminds me all day
Small hands clung to mine
Hearts pulled away.
A quick glance down
A vision of tears
My tear-stained top
Reveals your years.
Baby, my baby, please don’t cry
If I had wings, I’d take you and fly
To a land far away,
completely unknown
With sun and warm breezes
for us alone.
My tear-stained top
From wet, innocent eyes
Reflects my heart’s pain
As, too, it cries.
My tear-stained top
Is what’s left of the morn
A reminder to keep
A memory worn.
No Truer Friends
No truer friends Could there be found Than brother and sister By love bound. Always together They know no other This unique love Of sister and brother. May no one part The bond they share This close-knit thread That God put there.